Why only children can be hard work in the workplace
Having siblings often is an essential ingredient in helping a child navigate the world, teaching them how to share, be empathetic, and play well with others. With only children, there is less need to navigate the world as usually parents over compensate for the fact that they are the "one and only" child they have, and help make their lives as smooth and easy as possible. All of their attention goes on the child, and when the child asks for something, its hard to say no - afterall, you only have one child.
Only children are more often than not spoilt.
Only children are more often than not spoilt.
When an only child enters the workforce, they realise quite quickly for the first time that they are no longer "special". They are one of the team. They won't be treated differently and their expectatons are not only not met, but they are the first to let everyone know. Afterall, they have never been taught otherwise. And when they are challenged as to what is acceptable or not, they don't hold back - as they never have had to. At home, they have always been able to voice their opinion and then challenge the adult without ramification.
They get all of their parents attention
All of their parents attention has been spent on them their entire lives, right into their adult life. When they haven't liked something, and voiced it, it has always been fixed. It has been reported significantly by Psychologists that only children are often loners and always self absorbed.
Only children are usually best as leaders of organisations than as part of the team, as they like to "tell people what to do". They have been doing it their whole life and have usually become quite accustomed to doing so.
Tiger Woods was an only child
If you look at the fact that Winston Churchill, Joseph Stalin, Franklin D Roosevelt, Jean Paul Sartre, Frank Sinatra and Tiger Woods are all only children. Tiger Woods is a classic example of an only child that feels entitled. All of his parents efforts has gone into helping him become a superstar golfer. It's no wonder he felt entitled to have extra marital affairs, given that he has always been entitled to do whatever he wants and has never had to consider another human being. Siblings help us become more empathetic and consider others, something that only children in general find hard to do.
Birth order affects the roles and positions we seek
It's been proven that birth order influences the roles and positions we seek in our careers and affect the way we interact.
While you cannot help the fact that you are an only child, what you can do is develop an awareness and learn to adapt in the workplace. Only children can use the advantage of having been exposed to a higher vocabulary due to how much time they have spent with adults as opposed to other children, as a key influence in being positioned for leadership roles. Likewise with your self confidence, which an only child usually has in spades, is useful for leadership roles. But only if you are able to climb the ladder and develop skills in team work, learning how to expand your social side and be more tolerant of others in the workplace.
I have had mixed results with only children in the workforce. While they often show maturity as they mostly spend time with adults, they often feel entitled and demand attention. As a leader, I find that they can "back answer" a little too much with no remorse, as they have been entitled to do it their whole life and they may never have been reprimanded for doing so. This doesn't work so well in the workplace where a leader asks for something to be completed, and an "only child" employee constantly was valid reasons according to themselves as to why they cannot do it. Simply, they just don't want to and they have never had to do something they don't want.
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comments ( 7 )
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ReplyEfrain Teschner
02 Sep 2015Because there are no siblings in the family, the differentiation between parents and children that occurs in the multiple child family, where there is the distinction between the “we” of parents and the “they” of children is less likely to be made.
ReplyTanner Corn
01 Sep 2015That's why it's better for parents to avoid the "proud of you you" response and simply say "Good for you. When an only child becomes the major source of parental pride, then they take credit for how the only child has done, the child may now feel he is working as much or more for them than for himelf.
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24 Aug 2015Great article, exactly what I wanted to find.
ReplyChristina
24 Aug 2015How interesting! This has always been on my mind. Growing up in a very close extended we have people with siblings of 3 or 2 and some who are just an only child. It's not like every only child is demanding and attention seeking because we all know those traits could be found in anybody, no matter what order of birth you are but I could see how it could be more evident in an only child.
ReplyI never realized that being an only child would give you a better vocabulary, what an amazing insight. Now that I think about it, I can see how my friend, who's an only child, was so great at advanced English. I work with a lot of children and have a lot of younger sisters and relatives, hopefully my English skills didn't suffer because of it.
I only hope my relatives and friends don't extend their spoiled attitudes or bad habits into the workforce.
Beau
11 Aug 2015I totally agree with this! I am currently in a band doing events for a club at UTS and even though we have one person who's in charged of organising gigs and acts as our main contact to the university's club executives, there is one other member who, of course is an only child, constantly taking things into her own hands and complicates things. She has all the good intentions but sometimes we feel that it is unnecessary and we feel she just wants to do it her way.
ReplyThe prime example of Tiger Woods is something I can instantly relate to as I am from Thailand and he used to be big news there due to his mother, Kultida's ethnicity. Back then, we would often hear about his success as it is something Thai people somehow take pride in and was a household name, especially in my family as my grandfather was a keen golfer himself. I grew up hearing about his success as a golfer, but more than often it would quickly turn into discussion about his cheating scandal.
I, myself am an the older one of the 2 sisters and used to always voiced my wish of being the only child to my mom. She would always say that being the only child would mean you're spoiled rotten and she actually prayed for 2 girls so that we could even each other out. I never used to believe her as I just thought it was a stigma thing, but I sure am glad I have a sister now.